Monday, December 7, 2009
Ask Erin!-Trifecta Edition
Today I will be answering 3 questions....and miracle of miracles- none of these questions are poorly veiled insults! Woohoo! Let's get to answering.
Can you explain why everyone calls everyone “dude” these days?
First, let's begin with the basic definition of dude. Here is its basic definition (from Merriam-Webster):
Main Entry: 1dude
Pronunciation: \ˈdüd also ˈdyüd\
Etymology: origin unknown
1 : a man extremely fastidious in dress and manner : dandy
2 : a city dweller unfamiliar with life on the range; especially : an Easterner in the West
3 : fellow, guy —sometimes used informally as a term of address -hey, dude, what's up
— dud·ish \ˈd(y)üd-ish\ adjective
— dud·ish·ly adverb
Now, according to the Random House Historical Dictionary of American Slang, the first record of "dude" (in writing) was in a letter (dated 1877), written by artist Frederick Remington. He wrote: "Don't send me any more [drawings of] women or any more dudes."
The exact etymology appears to be unclear. It does seem that it used to carry a more pejorative tone. In the Jonathan Periam book, The Home and Farm Manual
(published in 1883), "dude" is used to indicate "an ill-bred and ignorant, but ostentatious, man from the city." Hence, dude ranches, popped up in the West to entertain tourists.
Over the years, the word has clearly evolved and can also be used for both genders now. It's surely ingrained in western culture- evident in films like The Big Lebowski, Dude, Where's My Car?, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, to name a few. So, you see M, it may have taken some time to burrow its way into our daily speak, but, it's clearly there now dude.
Onto the next question!!!!
erin, how long do you have to wait before you ask someone out after a breakup? i have a friend who i have a huge crush on. she's newly single. do i give it some time or jump in there? thanks
I think it's perfectly acceptable to go ahead and ask her out, unless she is clearly distraught about the breakup. If she is, then I would give it a little time. All this being said, she may not be ready for anything serious if she just got out of a relationship. She also may have you in the friend box, so be prepared that the crush may not be mutual. So, ask her out, take a chance, have fun, but be respectful of the head space she may be in. Let me know how it works out for you!
.....and our last question......
I have a question. My boyfriend recently lied to me about something. It's not a big deal, but I don't understand why he lied. Is this a red flag? Or should I just let it go?
This is interesting timing. I recently found out that someone close to me had lied about something seemingly small. The problem is that once someone lies about something, the trust is damaged. The question of why he lied- hmmm, perhaps there is even more to the story. But, you may not be able to figure it out. That's not to say that you can't and shouldn't move past this. If it happens again, I would be concerned. It has been my experience that people who lie once will often lie again. So, move on, let it go, but be aware.
Janky janks, email me your janky questions and I will do my best to answer them- firstname.lastname@example.org