Friday, January 8, 2010

Ask Erin!- Held Hostage, Anonymous, and Etiquette-Challenged

Okay! Welcome to the first Ask Erin! post of 2010! Woohoo! Today, I will be answering a variety of questions, as you will read in mere seconds. Also, I have been getting some interesting (read- sometimes strange) questions via formspring. I love it! Keep them coming. I will be doing a special Ask Erin! post later, just for those random questions. If they are not fit to post, I will do my best to answer them back via formspring. Let's get to the questions.....

My MIL buys us horrible crappy decor items as gifts. Lately,it's all framed Hallmark card -ish art. Now, normally I promptly donate it, but this Christmas she went out of her way to say that she hoped we'd find a place for this year's masterpiece as it has deep meaning to her (it's is a burgundy flower with an inspirational phrase underneath, like you'd find on clearance at Bed Bath and Beyond). This sucks for several reasons - first of all I really like her. Hideous taste aside, I don't want to hurt her feelings. And yes, we have pleaded with her for years not to buy us stuff, to no avail. Second of all I have a less than lackadaisical attitude about what I hang on my walls. In short, I am an art snob. Please advise.

Held Hostage by Mundane "Art"

ps: you are a skank.

Dear Held Hostage,

My first question to you would be, does your MIL live near by? In the interest of family peace and spared hurt feelings, would it be possible to hide this one inspirational burgundy flower, say in the closet, and put it up only when she comes to visit? If this is not possible, then I would keep it but not hang it. If it ever comes up, you can procure the "art" from its hiding spot and explain that it doesn't fit with your decor. That way, you have held on to it, as it has special meaning, but you don't have it dirtying up your art space. Ya dig? For all of you MILs out there, or any other stubborn family member or friend....buying "art" for someone else is tricky, unless you are absolutely SURE of the receiver's taste.

your favorite skank


(via formspring)

Ask Erin question...Do I tell my girlfriend that I don't like the way she gives a bj and if so, how???
3 days ago

Dear Anonymous BJ Boy,

This is a delicate matter, but an important one. If you are going to be in an intimate relationship with someone, you need to be able to tell them what you like, what you don't like. The goal, in all forms of sexy times, is to give each other pleasure and satisfy your partner. That being said, there should be some tact in presenting the info to your lover. Don't say: "You suck at sucking." Say, "I really love it when you fill in the blank (bite my neck, pull my hair, etc. etc.)." Then follow that up with some straight-forward directions...."Stroke my_______, lick my________, faster. softer, slower...." Whatevs you get the idea, So, yes, tell her, but make it sexy when you do.

from one skank to another



How late is too late to send a thank you card?

Thanks, Etiquette-challenged

Dear E-C,

I think that at the end of the day, it is never too late to send out a thank you card. I have not always been prompt with this, but I try to get around to it eventually! I always think a hand-written card or note is nicer, but if you are too pressed for time, a phone call or email will suffice. I would like to add that getting cards or letters in the mail is especially nice when you are not expecting it. So, get out a pen and paper and write to someone today....or type to someone today and then stick it in the will make you both feel kind of awesome.

Miss Skanky Manners

If you have an Ask Erin! question or any question at all, use the little formspring box on the right (if you would like to stay anonymous) or email me!


us said...

Though I enjoyed all of your answers, giving blow job tips in the form of a newfangled Mad Lib is a brilliant idea I kinda wish I'd thought of.

brendan donnelly said...

thanks for answering my bj question.

Lara said...

omigod - that was too funny!

philip said...

You're cracking me up!

Anonymous said...

Like the skanky Emily Post?

trey said...

i think you should totally make up your own dirty mad libs based on your advice.