Thursday, March 29, 2012

Personality Crisis

So, I have been terrible about posting lately, but the good news is that I have been doing a lot of writing.

The bad news is that I find I get a bit lost when doing the sort of writing I've been doing. It's personal, candid, and taps into the various personas I have inhabited.

Yes, I have been many things in the past: liar, cheat, manipulator, bitch, people-pleaser, junkie, good girl, bad girl, lover, hater, heartbreaker, heart-broken, destroyer , victim, perpetrator, loser, winner, giver, taker, and above all, as lames as it sounds, a survivor.

I have survived being all of these things. I have survived being me. And, somehow, putting it all down on paper, there is really no way to avoid it or run from it.

The hard part has been trying not to slip back into old belief systems, mostly about myself. Frankly, it has been causing me a lot of anxiety. But, I think I am reaching the other side of this minor personality crisis and I'm beginning to feel secure in the fact that I am living today, in the present, reflecting on who I've been without remaining there.

This may be narcissistic to even write about, but I don't really care. It's where I've been, it's what's been going's the truth.

I am getting ready to take a little vacation in France and I cannot wait!

P.S. You can follow my adventures foibles on @rarelywrongerin

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